The Eyes Have It

So, I went to the eye doctor today at 2pm. My eyes are still kinda dilated, round like saucers. I usually love getting those drops that are reminiscent of belladonna, which ladies would use to attract a man back in some other century (18th perhaps?). I think I look pretty sexy with huge pupils, especially now that I have them as a sober person. This pupil thing has been studied, you see. Apparently, when we are attracted to someone, our pupils enlarge. This will tend to interest the other person, because everyone appreciates being liked, and most people will find them interesting as a result. This is typically what I think about when I have visited the eye doctor. I enjoy going out in public on these days, as a rule choosing to stroll where I can easily see and be seen. ;)

Well, today was not one of those days. I am extremely near sighted. When my eyes get dilated, however, I am extremely far-sighted, leaving me blurry and just plain weird sighted up to about 4 feet. While cautiously driving home, I realized my most important task for the day must be put aside for later...my studying! I was so annoyed that I had not thought this through. My usual excitement faded, as I became less and less enamored by my sultry eyes. Grrr.

So I did what I do best in these situations. I fiddled, I fumbled, and ended up putting old photos in an album. This was actually kinda fun. And now, I must put these tired eyes to rest. They have been wide open for a bit too long. Good night all.

Domesticated roosters and Compost Elimination

A couple of days ago, I walked by my favorite little blue house on Padre Street, and saw a man removing leaves from the ivy that grows out front near the sidewalk. This struck me as amusing for 2 reasons:

1) he was removing valuable compost that helps the ivy grow healthily, as if it were harmful somehow, and...
2) he was stepping all over it while doing the removal!

We smiled and nodded hello to eachother, as I resisted the urge to stop him from his duties, insisting that the leaves were meant to stay there, and why are you traumatizing these unfortunate plants?!

The next day, I changed my route only slightly, and noticed a row of lovely rose bushes in front of a huge estate like home on Garden Street. When I finished sniffing the roses, I looked up to find a rooster in the driveway. Then, I saw 2 other interesting foul, who I believe to also be roosters of a different breed. I had never seen such beautiful chickens. I should research the net to find a suitable picture, because a description by me just won't explain. They were domesticated to the point of just pecking around the open driveway and grounds, looking for a morsel or two, possibly bug hunting. I don't know anyone around downtown SB who would keep chickens in their yard. I think that's cool.

Peace to all...Enjoy the sunshine!

Michelle :)

Gratitude~What a difference a year can make

Gratitude

December 11th, 2007

I am grateful to be completely here, and fully alive. I am glad I finally woke up to reality, pain and bliss combined sometimes.

I am grateful for guidance, support, and direction, teaching to learn and learning to teach.
I am grateful for learning to love my inner child.

I am grateful for Trader Joes lava cakes with fresh raspberries. Mmm.

I am grateful for acceptance and surrender, and times when I won't, so I can see the difference.

I am grateful to let it all grow.

I am grateful to share my writing with others today.I am grateful for a sense of humor, smiles and laughter abound.

I am grateful for the wind in the trees, sunshine, the birds and the bees. And butterflies mating in front of me.

I am grateful for extraordinary adolescents being true to themselves and reminding me to always be real.

I am grateful for His Holiness the Dalai Lama for demonstrating patience, love, and compassion for all sentient beings.

I am grateful for all sentient beings, and the lessons they bring.

2006

I am so grateful that I know what I want out of a relationship, and what I do NOT want.

I am grateful that I wouldn't sleep with a man who would just go for it just because I happen to be available.I am grateful that I am worth more than a temporary fix to a permanent problem.I am grateful that another woman's embarrassing behavior with men has given me clarity.

I am grateful that I am willing to wait for who I really want to share my life with, and who really wants to share their life with me.I am grateful to realize that no matter how nice a guy may seem to be, that does not mean that he is really all that fantastic, nor does it mean that he is the man for me.

I am grateful that my honesty will eliminate anyone who does not need to be in my life. I am also grateful that whoever stays can handle my honesty.

I am grateful to be single. I am grateful that I do not want to be single, but that I am right where I am supposed to be.

I don't need to hide this anymore. I want a relationship, and I am not afraid to say it. It's just not my time, yet...apparently.

All that online "communication" we have doesn't mean crap if we don't really talk to each other. You don't all really know me.

So now you know more.

By the way, I learned all this boundary setting and ideal relationship stuff in recovery. I also learned how to be grateful, patient, loving and tolerant. At least eventually, the patience comes...

My, how I've grown. :)

Mmmm...poetic mercy

I'm a poet and I didn't really know it. That was the case until I posted some of my creativity for all to enjoy. There is something quite satisfying with seeing one's writing in print, rich with vibrant colors chosen by me (mostly...btw if anyone knows how to access more templates, please share. thank you). I really like this blogging thing. I am new to using this type of forum. And honestly, I very rarely share my writing with others. What a travesty! So...feel free to comment, even if (and esp when) you don't like it. Please tell me what thrills you and sends you into an emotional upheaval of your torrid past. Let me know if reading it felt like eating cardboard.

Now I really have to leave cyberspace so the real world won't wonder if I met an early death.

Sweet dreams of peace and love to all. :)